| Writing Awards and Distinctions 2010 Finalist, National Society of Newspaper Columnists 2010 Column-Writing Competition Winner, 2010 Next Generation Indie Book Awards, "The 40-Year-Old Version" Finalist, 2010 ForeWord Magazine "Book of the Year Awards", "The 40-Year-Old Version" What Moms Already Know About Super Bowl Lingo Fifth Place Winner, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest Strong Safety: The moment at which a parent says "Hold my hand! We're in a parking lot!"... Giving My Kids a Tune-Up Semi-Finalist, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest some unwritten law says my children had to be protected from toxic influences like the wail of an electric guitar, a mumbled verse, or a rap about anything other than food groups and proper hygiene... When Rock Bands and Kid Shows Collide Semi-Finalist, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest I'm wondering what other well-known musical acts might see the kids' space as a way to expand their fan base... Official Judge, 2010 Erma Bombeck International Writing Competition 2009 Second Place, National Society of Newspaper Columnists 2009 Column-Writing Competition Honorable Mention, National Society of Newspaper Columnists' 2009 Blog Competition Offspring Of The Marvel/Disney Marriage First Place Winner, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest While they’re busy figuring out how to tell The Hulk he now reports to Mickey Mouse, I’m suggesting some new movies that leverage the best of both brands... What Will Kid Movies Be Based On Next? Finalist, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest What's left to be scraped at the bottom of the kids media barrel? Book Ideas Scrapped in 2009 Finalist, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest While reports of the Spears book's postponement got plenty of media coverage, other scrapped book ideas went unnoticed... What's in a Nonsense Name? Honorable Mention, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest The trend in giving your company a nonsense name reached a new high when Sci Fi channel announced it was changing its name to "Syfy."... 2008 Finalist,"Best Commentary," Online News Association Awards Second Place, National Society of Newspaper Columnists 2008 Column-Writing Competition New U.S. Citizenship Test: The Version You Didn't See 1st Place Winner, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest This month, a new U.S. Citizenship test goes into effect. Given the general level of civic education in the U.S., it's surprising the project hasn't been outsourced to India... Fee-quent Flying 2nd Place Winner, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest In June, American Airlines began charging passengers $15 for the first checked bag on domestic flights. The Secret Truth Behind Diners Finalist, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest Just like everyone in the Northeast has a favorite road rage swear word, so too does every man, woman, and child in the urban Northeast have a favorite diner... How to Quit Your Job Finalist, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest I've resigned from eight jobs over the past 18 years, and have handled the "giving notice" moments with everything from heartfelt empathy to sadistic glee. What Reality Television Can Do For The Olympics Semi-Finalist, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest Reality television show producers, proudly noting they invented the concept of obscure Americans competing in tight, skimpy outfits for glory and lucrative contracts way before the Olympics came around to it... What's Not to Like About Those Post-Debate Focus Groups Semi-Finalist, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest Perhaps the most frustrating staple of post-debate network news coverage is that all- too-familiar battleground state focus group... 2007 Named Humor Writer of the Month, Erma Bombeck Writing Institute, University of Dayton 'Price is Right' Audition Notes 4th Place Winner, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest Now that Drew Carey has been named to replace Bob Barker on "The Price is Right," producers have recently released their audition remarks... Citizen Came Finalist, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest Responding to charges it was out of touch with real life... Voter Tune-Out Finalist, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest Election officials have unveiled a new proposal for ensuring fair U.S. voting protocols in 2008... 2006 Thanks and Misgivings 2nd Place Winner, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest I'm looking at a photo of my self topless... First Day Jitters for the Kid in Dad Finalist, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest The night before the first day of school was always the longest night of my life Homework Bound Finalist, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest Last week, my 6 year-old son's Thanksgiving-themed homework assignment was to tell a personal story... Don't Bank On It Finalist, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest Few American institutions have changed as little over time as the local bank... It's Valen-Time Finalist, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest For my sister-in-law Jessica, February 14 is not only Valentine's Day, but also her birthday... My Oscar-Worthy Experience Honorable Mention, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest Fifteen years ago, I was an unemployed 22 year-old living in a friend's studio apartment... The Age of Obsolescence Honorable Mention, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest You know it's time to update your home technology when your six-year-old complains... When the Mice Are Away... Semi-Finalist, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest This week, my family made the six-hour trek to my ex wife's parents' house in Martha's Vineyard... In the Cards Finalist, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest June and July are big celebration months for me... Pimp My Bag Semi-Finalist, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest It's probably safe to say women are more obsessed with their personal bags than men are... Potty Train Honorable Mention, HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest ...you've probably noticed the foul odor hitting you like a slimy smack in the nose at the far end of the tracks... Beauty on the Beast Semi-Finalist,HumorPress.com Humor Writing Contest I've always been the kind of person who believed that shampoo and conditioner could coexist in the same bottle... |
| Major Publishings Newsweek Slouching Toward Fatherhood (April 6, 2009) I thought being a dad would come easily to me. But soon after my son's birth, I was looking for a way out. ------------------------------------------------------------------- The New York Times Magazine The 36 Year-Old Version (August 12, 2007) To my naive 37-year-old eyes, my parents' condominium was just a place to sleep while my wife and I, separated after 10 years of marriage, "figured things out." -------------------------------------------------------- The New York Post It's Quitting Time (June 2, 2008) I've resigned from eight jobs over the past 18 years, and have handled the "giving notice" moments with everything from heartfelt empathy to sadistic glee... -------------------------------------------------------- The New York Daily News Got a Second? (December 12, 2008) The last leap second was recorded at the end of 2005. You spent it lingering in bed on a cold Thursday morning, remember? An Open Letter to Rob Zombie (September 6, 2007) ...But you can help make the real world a less brutal place than the world you depict on film... -------------------------------------------------------- New Jersey Monthly The Mother of All Holidays (May, 2006) When my brother Paul and I were in middle school, we ordered a "personally engraved tribute plaque" for our mom a few weeks before Mother's Day... -------------------------------------------------------- The Star-Ledger A 'Boo' for Halloween Brutality (October 31, 2006) A walk down the Halloween aisle at CVS or Walgreens proves the point: Gore again wins the popular vote... Thanks and Misgivings (November 23, 2006) I'm looking at a photo of my self topless... Holiday on Nice (December 20, 2006) Somewhere in Africa, there's a goat with an unsuspecting Kenyan family's name on it... Memorial Daze (May 25, 2007) Like many communities, Maplewood has scheduled two big events for Memorial Day... First Day Jitters for the Kid in Dad (September 4, 1007) The night before the first day of school was always the longest night of my life... Valentine's Day Disconnect (February 14, 2008) Valentine's Day is probably the one holiday least connected to its historical and cultural roots... -------------------------------------------------------- Chicken Soup for the Soul: Thanks, Dad Published in 2010 "It Was My Dad" -------------------------------------------------------- Chicken Soup for the Soul: Divorce and Recovery Published in 2008 "The Gift" -------------------------------------------------------- The Good Men Project: Real Stories from the Front Lines of Modern Manhood Published in 2009 "Birth of a Father" -------------------------------------------------------- Babble.com Father's Day (August 16, 2007) "Daddy, lock your doo-wer." one of my daughters says as we pull out of my ex- wife's driveway... -------------------------------------------------------- Wowowow.com (Women on the Web) A Father's Days (June 16, 2009) Father’s Day – at least as Hallmark and Wikipedia define it – doesn’t mean all that much to me, even though being a dad is one of the most important jobs I have... -------------------------------------------------------- CommonTies Invincibility (June 20, 2007) "She's not gonna make it," my 7-year-old son Evan announces recently... -------------------------------------------------------- New Jersey Jewish News The Gift of Giving…or Getting your Goat (December 18, 2008) Somewhere in Kenya, there’s a goat with an unsuspecting family’s name on it. -------------------------------------------------------- Mediabistro.com Public Speaking Secrets for Job Seekers (March 19, 2008) Be Your Own Best Book Publicist (July 20, 2009) |
| About Families (PA) Arizona Parenting Magazine (AZ) Atlanta Parent Magazine (GA) Austin Family Magazine (TX) Baltimore's Child (MD) Baton Rouge Parents Magazine (LA) Central Penn Parent (PA) City Parent (Ontario) Curious Parents (NJ/PA) Family-Life Magazine (CA) Irving Parent (TX) Kansas City Parent (KS) Kids Vermont (VT) Mahoning Valley Parent Magazine (OH) MetroFamily Magazine (OK) Nashville Parent (TN) New Jersey Family (NJ) New Jersey Newsroom (NJ) |
| North State Parent (CA) Ohio Valley Parent (OH) Parent Magazine (OH) Parenting Plus (FL) Parents' Source (PA) ParentWise Austin (TX) Portland Family Magazine (OR) Piedmont Parent (NC) Sacramento Parent Magazine (CA) Staten Island Parent (NY) Toledo Area Parent News (OH) The Art of Manliness The Irreverent Homemaker The Jewish Advocate (MA) The Parent Paper (NJ) The Village Family Magazine (ND) Western New York Family Magazine Windsor Parent Magazine (Ontario) |
| My parenting essays have also been syndicated in regional magazines and newspapers in the U.S. and Canada, including: |
| The 40-Year-Old Version: Humoirs of a Divorced Dad (Wyatt-MacKenzie, 2009) "Funny and Touching" -- The Star Ledger "A Great Gift to Any Father" -- About.com |
| My Book |
| My Blogs |
| 1st Place Winner 2010 Next Generation Indie Book Awards, Humor Category 2nd Place Winner 2010 ForeWord "Book of the Year" Awards, Humor Category Finalist 2010 ForeWord "Book of the Year" Awards, Essays Category |